HEY, SNAP OUT OF IT

The just concluded Valentine's day surely came with a lot of fuss here and about. Everyone anticipated the media blowups of engagements coupled with boxes of chocolates, roses, teddies, rings and all sort of things that keep us 'woowing' and 'awwwning'. There were lots of memes teasing the 'singles' and their funny/bitter reactions to activities of those in sweet relationships which kept the valentine fever burning.

And finally the day came and just as anticipated, they were noises all over social media, people got engaged, others were met with mind blowing surprises, some received cute gifts and loving appreciations. But just as the celebrations were ongoing, of course there were others who had quite the opposite. Sadly, some lost their relationships on that very day, probably after they caught their boyfriends or girlfriends hooking up with significant others asides them (heartbreak)

I personally saw this clip of a girl threatening her boyfriend after he had uploaded the picture of a girl which he tagged 'bae♥️' which led to the supposed girlfriend's outrage. There was another post of a girl who wrecked the windscreen and windows of the newly bought car of her ex on that very day (smh)

I'm sure so many people were full of wishes and hopes of getting proposed to on a Valentine's day of love which they felt would have been the best proposal ever, yeah some actually got lucky and received the best proposals they've ever wished for in their entire lives, but then what happened to the rest who didn't get proposed to by their romantic partners? They prolly snuggled up in their bed at the end of the day and cried their souls out because the 'wait' continues.

(Exhales)

Which brings us to the main reason for this discussion. The issue of marriage.  I have a friend who is about his mid 30s, he usually hits me up with sad talks concerning his family and colleagues pressurizing him to get married, and everytime, I made sure to tell him not to allow their pressures and complaints affect his daily activities which I noticed was already happening to him. Similarly, I have so many girlfriends who are super excited about the idea of marriage especially now that they've completed schooling and are about 'ripe' for marriage. Oh am I forgetting to add the pressures coming from family and friends who are bothered that 'we girls are getting too old' and haven't gotten married yet, and so on. Even my own brother jokingly tells me to hasten up and settle down before I go sour, and we'll all laugh at the 'joke' (yeah joke in inverted commas cos we know it's very far from a real joke.)🙄🙄🙄😒☹️

But if you think about this really, why put pressure on yourselves? So many of us are out there clamouring about getting married, especially very young girls who have sworn never to get married to nothing less than multimillionaires and when they see the opportunity they do not even think twice before pouncing on it. Yeah, it's the money that really matters right? Some ladies have gotten very frustrated by their parents, probably getting to their thirties and so have grown very desperate and decided to settle down with just anyone who happens to find them attractive. (which is very sad, and wrong)

We hear different news about broken marriages just as I saw in a post today that just as at January this year there have been recorded about 4000 divorce applicants in Abuja, Nigeria

and we begin to ask ourselves, what is really happening? The pressure from society has led to many hasty marriages which have all ended up badly and instead of people trying to trace the problem, no! Especially the anxious 'single and searching', they're not interested in things like that, all they want is to get settled to avoid societal criticisms. Some people even make the mistake of marrying close to strangers, people who they do not really know in and out, just because they've been blinded with promises of heaven and Earth, just like the story I read on news today of two northern girls 20 and 25 who were raped and molested by their own husband. (Link👉Husband hold wives captive and molests them )After going through that story I realized the dangers of unhealthy marriages, they could lead one to an early grave, infact I concluded that it is even better to remain single and take your time to decide who your life partners would be instead of getting married to someone you haven't fully identified with and dying in silence.

We all need to be very careful, do not let the society define and decide what your life should look like, I've always been of the opinion that what people call society are merely accumulated illusions that have been mistaken for reality and fortunately some wise ones have learned to live beyond them. Life has no formula, no society can decide the life path of each and every one of its member. Our decisions are ours to make, not our mothers, not our fathers, definitely not society. I own my life and I decide what happens in it, so do you♥️

So if you're out there seeking for a life partner, you've been single for so long and desperately in need of love, affection, attention, you aren't getting any younger and you want to find a suitable partner that you'll spend the rest of your life with, you're a lady in your late twenties and you're being pressured to leave your father's house

Or you're a guy and can't remember the last time you slept soundly after all the pressures at your workplace to get settled before your gray hairs are out and the only thing stopping you from really exploding is the fact that you're simply being a gentleman and respecting yourself

My solid advice for you is this... focus on yourself, know what you want, channel that energy spent on worrying to bettering your present state. It could be simple improvements on your personality and temperament, ever tried looking within yourself to fix your flaws? I mean if you're clamouring on living with your spouse, you'd rather be the best partner one could ever wish for right? You could even focus on elevating your business ideas, try catapulting your networking skills, work on good relationships with people around you, you never can tell who is watching, let that great vibe of yours attract that which you seek, I think there's this saying that goes like this "it finally appears just when you stop searching" or something like that, and finally if you really believe, the universe will conspire to make it happen! Good luck fam'

PS: here is a link I'd love to share on how to deal with these pressures👇Shove 'em that middle finger